In the year 1997 21st Century Super-Hacker Piggy Stern created a computer consciousness called DARTANIAN. DARTANIAN was coded to display a low form of para-savant intelligence and would represent the pinnacle of Piggy Stern’s career. The intricate and revolutionary programming allowed DARTANIAN to perform only one function: Create MS Paint pictures at the artistic and conceptual level of a child and leave them in a newly created desktop folder called “The Glenwood Collection”.
While attending a seized property auction Funny Blood contributor Fred Pecker saw an item that struck him as particularly valuable: A Compaq Presario with hieroglyphics drawn all over it in gold permanent marker. Fred immediately purchased the item, and upon powering it up discovered a lone folder: The Glenwood Collection. The folder contained a notepad document, which served as Piggy Stern’s personal diary, and hundreds of MS Paint files created by DARTANIAN.
After an impassioned and ignorant debate the Funny Blood Committee on Ethics voted unanimously to open Piggy Stern’s personal diary. We haven’t really read it yet since it’s kind of long, but we’ll probably get to it someday. From what we can figure out by skimming it really fast Piggy Stern was driven mad by DARTANIAN’s art and committed suicide.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I would like to introduce:
THE GLENWOOD COLLECTION
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These are nothing short of amazing. It makes me want to, like, take turns playing the original grand theft auto.
love it
And the cat went fiddle i fee!!!
In trying to decipher the truth about the DARTANIAN program, I’ve come up with some thoughts. Maybe DARTANIAN is a acronym. Perhaps it stands for:
Do
All
Robots
Think
Alike?
No
I
Assume
Not
Or, more likely:
Draw
Art
Really
Terribly
And
Never
Inhale
Again,
Nerd
Furthermore, perhaps it’s an anagram. Take a look at what some simple rearrangement tells us!
DARTANIAN = ART IN A NAD
SECRETS REVEALED!
my favorite was the kane painting.
this website rules.